Saturday, May 8, 2010

Coming home

What a joyful, joyful moment in our lives, to be welcoming our son home! We are savoring every breath, every smile, every hug, every "I love you." It is a truly extraordinary experience to meet a child in another country, and to somehow, instantly, know him as if he had always been part of us. It defies reason, yet it is there, that depth of love that lets us know that this was always what was meant to be. What a rare and tremendous opportunity we've been given. What a gift.

This next step is bittersweet, however, because we know this new beginning also marks the ending of the previous chapter in Jairo's life. It was very difficult to leave For His Children, knowing what a wonderful home it had been to Jairo. So it was with many tears (on my part and the Tias part -- not on Jairo's!) that we said goodbye to the people who had been Jairo's family for so long. They threw a wonderful going away party for Jairo the afternoon before we left, and all his Tias and friends were there, as well as all the staff and all the children of FHC. It was such a special way to commemorate the relationships that had developed over the years, and we know that these bonds will not be broken with distance. We are already making plans to return for a visit next year!

Jairo is a boy with a very open mind and open heart, which continues to amaze and humble us. We were so impressed and touched by how peaceful and positive he was about coming to a new country. Given that everything here is foreign to him -- a new home, new family members (strangers, really), indecipherable language, strange food, unfamiliar clothes, different routine -- it would be understandable if he was completely overwhelmed with fear, anxiety, anger and sadness. Yet he handled it with the grace and ease of a person much older than his tender six years. He was curious, and eager to explore and learn about all the things to discover in his new home. This was a real gift to us, as it eased our minds to know that he was feeling so comfortable in this unfamiliar environment.

Our family embraced Jairo -- literally and figuratively -- from the moment he arrived. They greeted us at the airport, and although Jairo was a little shy at first, he quickly warmed up to his grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. And he was very exited to finally meet Duffer, my parents' dog, who he had told his Tias was "waiting for me in the United States." We are so grateful to have such a wonderful family -- they are warm, welcoming and loving, and they helped Jairo feel comfortable right away. We are very lucky.

Eric had some time before having to return to work, so the three of us spent our first week here in the U.S. just enjoying being together. We went for walks, played in parks, and took a few paseos, including a trip to the Baltimore aquarium and to Chuck E. Cheese (wow, we had no idea how CRAZY that place is!). We enjoyed playing with the new toys and books in Jairo's room, and loved watching the delight on his face with each new thing he discovered. He is entertained by the simplest things -- like chasing squirrels, which he had never seen before -- and so every day brings something new.

This journey, which started long ago, has been one of the highlights of our life. These moments in life are a rare gift, so we are savoring every step, and enjoying just sitting back and rediscovering our world through the innocent eyes of our boy.




























Thursday, May 6, 2010

For His Children

One of the nicest surprises in our adoption process was discovering For His Children, Jairo's orphanage in Quito. It is a rare gift in life to encounter true excellence, so it has been a great pleasure for us to get to know the wonderful people of FHC, and to learn about their ministry devoted to caring for children in need. We have been so inspired by their commitment to excellence, their generosity of spirit, their patience with an often frustrating system, and their vision for serving those unable to care for themselves. Our lives have been forever changed by knowing these good folks, and we want to share their story, so that others might have the good fortune of knowing them too.

FHC (www.ForHisChildren-Ecuador.org) was founded by Clark and Melinda Vaughn, an American couple who visited Ecuador for the first time back in 1988. While there, something stirred in them, and for reasons unknown at the time, they felt called to return. So after a lot of thinking, questioning and praying, they decided to leave the US and move with their two children to Quito. Once in Quito, while trying to figure out what to do there, they took in an abandoned baby, as foster parents. One child led to two, then three, and they eventually realized this was what they were meant to do with their lives. So they made it official, and founded FHC, an orphanage devoted to caring for abandoned children in Ecuador.

Twenty years later, Clark and Melinda continue to run FHC, now with the help of a large team of staff, volunteers, partners and supporters. Much like CEOs of a successful company, they have built an organization that has a clear mission, is run efficiently and effectively, hires and retains the best employees, sets and achieves meaningful goals, and most importantly, serves its clients (in this case, the children) with excellence.

Eric and I believe that FHC is a shining star in the world of orphanages, and we hope their example can and will serve as a model to help improve the care of orphans around the world. Here are just a few of the ways they make a significant, positive difference every day:

Physical.
First and foremost, the FHC team ensures that every child in their care has all of their physical needs met. They live in clean, safe, bright, warm homes. Each child has their own clothes -- an important factor in letting each child know they are unique and important -- and the clothes are always immaculately clean and a perfect fit. (We were amazed to learn that the Tias wash the school uniforms every day, including the shoes -- which is far more often than we do laundry here at home!) The children are fed healthy, nutritious foods, which are part of monthly diet plans developed for FHC by nutritionists to address the specific health needs of the children. FHC teaches the children excellent hygiene and grooming habits, including daily bathing, monthly haircuts, and pretty hairstyles each morning for the girls.

The children lead active lives, full of lots of daily exercise -- riding bikes, long walks, running around the large yards, climbing on jungle-gyms, and jumping on the trampoline. They also have swimming lessons and playtime in the FHC pool, which was designed as a therapy pool for the children with special needs. Those with special physical needs also receive daily physical therapy from their Tias. We witnessed this many times -- the Tias sitting out in the warm sun with the children, massaging their limbs, moving their bodies to keep them strong and limber, and giving them a lot of positive physical contact, which is so important for their growth and health. And each child who has a physical challenge is given the right equipment (wheel chairs, etc) to ensure that they are mobile, functional, and comfortable.

Intellectual.
Beyond the needs of the body, the needs of the mind are also held in high regard at FHC. Each child is evaluated regularly, to determine what mental strengths and challenges they possess, and to monitor their growth and development. FHC employs educational specialists to create individual programs for each child, addressing their unique needs, and any child who is physically able to go to school does so. FHC built a pre-school on site, so all the toddlers learn there every day, and the school-age children are driven by Tio Oscar (FHC's driver) to their respective schools. At last count, there were four different schools that the children attend -- each going to the school that can best serve their unique needs. We loved the daily routine of loading and unloading the children from Tio Oscar's van -- all the children in their uniforms, the able-bodied kids helping the children with special needs -- it was a happy jumble of activity each morning and afternoon.

Social
.
One of the things we appreciate and value the most in Jairo is his empathy and good-natured disposition. It is not uncommon to see him help another child (or adult) who looks like they could use a hand, and he is completely comfortable in unfamiliar situations, meeting new people and befriending them. We give all the credit for his social skills to FHC! The children at FHC are raised in homes with about 12 other children, so from early on, they learn to share, play nicely, be accepting of differences, and help one another. The children are taught to respect one another and adults, and as such, they are well-behaved, friendly, and loving. You would think a house with 12 children would be chaotic, but the FHC homes are actually quite orderly, calm and happy. This is a direct result of some very good "parenting" and socialization by the Tias and FHC staff!

Emotional.
Prior to knowing FHC, we had often felt sad about the plight of children without families. I've cried many times, thinking of what life would be like for a child who had to live without the stability and love of parents. And I've often projected my own assumptions into what I assumed were the emotions of the children -- sadness, loneliness, fear, rejection, despair.

But as we've come to know FHC, it has been a wonderful surprise to discover that these are not the emotions the FHC children carry in their hearts. In fact, the children in FHC's care are happy, playful, hopeful and peaceful -- everything you could hope a child would be. They are well-balanced, self-confident, capable and have strong self-esteem. This is a result of the the unending positive reinforcement and teaching they receive from their FHC caregivers, including their Tias, administrators, psychologists, and Clark & Melinda. It is so reassuring to know that the children don't lead lives of despair, but rather, that they are being raised to have healthy, positive emotional balance in their lives. We could only hope that all the children of the world were being given such strong emotional support!

Spiritual.
Clark & Melinda founded FHC as a Christian ministry, so it is no surprise that all the good they do is rooted in a strong faith. This faith is shared with the children in subtle ways -- in all the loving details described above. And this faith gently makes its way into the hearts of the children, so they come to know that they are deeply loved, no matter what, by God. Despite whatever circumstances they have in their life, they can always be assured that they are special, that they have a purpose in life, and that God is always with them. I think that's about the best gift a child can receive.

*****

FHC has now cared for more than 500 children. I am overwhelmed to think that 500 lives have been changed for the better because one couple had the courage to follow a tiny voice inside. To think that back in 1988, Clark & Melinda were living a "normal" life in California, Clark working as an attorney, the family raising two children, like so many of us. And they dared to listen to that voice inside, and to heed its call. I wonder how many of us feel a tiny voice inside, calling us to do something different. I wonder if I would have the courage to follow that voice, even though it might be leading me down a path that seems unconventional, impractical, impossible, or just plain scary? I can only hope that I would have the courage and wisdom to give that voice a chance... and to follow wherever it might lead.


www.ForHisChildren-Ecuador.org

Friday, March 19, 2010

Gifts

As we prepare to end our time here in Ecuador and return home to the US, we have been reflecting on just how wonderful this entire experience has been. It seems that everything has aligned for us, coming together to make this a very happy, special and peaceful experience. We are so grateful to every single person who has worked on our behalf, supported us, prayed for us, and given generously to us. Thank you, dear friends... you mean the world to us, and your kindness will not be forgotten.

In looking back, we feel that our experience has been a series of gifts... gifts that we didn't expect, which has made it all the more special. While this list isn't complete, it does capture some of the most significant gifts we've received.

- Our greatest gift is the gift of our son, Jairo. We have dreamed of him for a long time, and we are so blessed to finally know him, love him, and welcome him into our family. We can't think of a more meaningful thing to do with our lives than to provide a family for this child, and we are thankful for the opportunity to share our lives with him.

- We have had the great privilege of seeing excellence at work, and that is in every detail of Para Sus Ninos (For His Children), Jairo's orphanage. Clark and Melinda Vaughn, the founders and directors, are examples of how great something can be when you put your full energy and all your talents towards it. PSN is known as the best orphanage in Ecuador, and we would extend that to say that it is one of the best -- if not the best -- in the world. We are so thankful that Jairo and his peers have been in such a great environment, and so glad that this is where our adoption led us. (See next post re: PSN)

- Much of what makes PSN great is the loving, attentive care that the Tias give to the children. We have been fortunate to get to know all the Tias at Jairo's house, Casa Fe. They have welcomed us with open arms, and the warm and amiable nature of Ecuadorian culture. We are so thankful to them for their excellent care of Jairo over the past four years. And we are glad to call them friends -- friends that we look forward to staying in contact with and visiting when we return soon.

- In addition to the daily care that the Tias provide, the children also benefit from a team of professionals who attend to their needs. One of these professionals, Susana, a child psychologist, was our main contact throughout this process in Ecuador. Susana was so incredibly helpful and supportive to us, and many times we relied on her to help with translations. She accompanied us to doctor's appointments and school functions, and took time out of her day to meet any need or answer any question we had. We are very thankful for the timing of our trip, as Susana just left to go work in the Galapagos -- so it was a great gift to us that she was able to be here for our full process.

- Speaking of professionals, Jairo was fortunate to have Dr. Carrion in his life. Jairo visited with Dr. Carrion a number of times over the past few months, and we were prepared to pay for the visits once we arrived here. But Dr. Carrion, being the very kind-hearted man that he is, generously donated his services to Jairo. It is so reassuring to discover just how many kind and generous people there are in our world.

- Our adoption agency went to great lengths to prepare us for any possible challenge or problem we might face as adoptive parents, particularly because we chose to adopt an older child. They warned us of how difficult it might be for Jairo to bond and attach to us, so we were prepared for a rough road. But things could not have been more natural, positive and happy with Jairo, and he attached to us immediately. This came as a great surprise, and we are so thankful that he is such an open little boy, and that he welcomed us into his life with so much generosity and love.

- Part of what has made the transition so easy and peaceful for Jairo is our location. We were completely taken by surprise when Melinda offered us the opportunity to stay in the one private house that is on the orphanage property. The owners, the Swansons, happen to be back in the US for the few months that we were down here, so the timing couldn't have been better -- in fact, it was the perfect gift for us. We have loved living here -- it is beautiful, peaceful, safe, and most importantly, it is close to Jairo's friends and Tias, so he has been in a familiar, comfortable environment. We are so grateful to the Swansons, and Melinda, for the gift of this house.

- One of the many great things about the house is that it comes with wonderful neighbors -- the Johnsons -- and their beautiful dog, Suki. Jairo couldn't be more in love with Suki, and he lives to play with her every day. And Peg and Judd Johnson have been so gracious and helpful to us -- from inviting us down for dinner and a movie, to taking us to the jungle. They have been so warm and friendly, and we appreciate their friendship very much.

- Ecuador is a beautiful country, and we have thoroughly enjoyed taking in the beautiful mountain vistas every day. We have been very lucky to have had beautiful weather our entire time here. It is currently winter in Quito, which normally means lots of rain. But it has been warm, sunny and lovely almost every day. Another great gift.

- Eric and I both had a lot of work to do on our Spanish when we arrived in Ecuador, and we weren't sure how to go about it. But then we were given the names of two Spanish instructors -- Jaime and Paulina -- who turned out to be fantastic. They both came to our house every morning to teach us, and they made learning easy and interesting. We are so fortunate to have found them, and thankful to them for our much-improved Spanish. We now count them among our Ecuadorian friends, and in fact, Jaime and his family are going to come visit us in DC this summer.

- Having traveled often through Latin America, we have had our fair share of travel sicknesses. And we would have thought that during a two-month stay in Ecuador, surely at least one of us would be sick at some point. But, amazingly, all three of us have been completely healthy and feeling great every day. We are so thankful for this, as it has enabled us to just relax and thoroughly enjoy our stay.

- As if we hadn't had enough great things handed to us over the past two months, yesterday we received one last surprise gift. Our plane leaves tomorrow at 6:30am, which means we need to leave our house at 4am -- so we've been a little concerned with how to find a cab at that hour. Then last night we had Peg & Judd over for dinner, and Judd mentioned he's heading to Haiti to help them rebuild. And as luck would have it (or probably something much greater than luck), it turns out Judd is on our flight (which connects through Miami). So Peg is going to drive us all to the airport in the morning. What are the chances? Well, I guess we shouldn't be surprised -- this is just another wonderful gift in a long series of gifts. And we are very, very thankful.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Things I want to remember

Our time here in Ecuador has been very special, and there are so many little details that have made it so. I've tried to take "mental pictures" of everything, so I can always remember how things looked, felt, smelled, tasted and sounded. And I've been jotting a few notes throughout our stay to help me remember some of the little things I want to remember...

- Listening to Jairo sing in bed in the mornings

- Playing "who can say i love you the most times" after we put Jairo to sleep

- Watching him fall asleep in the blink of an eye in the back of cabs

- Asking him where his food is, and him drawing a line somewhere on his body to indicate how full he is

- Watching Eric pull Jairo with the swing tied to the crocodile in the backyard

- Jairo's first words in English: Mother... Father... Come on! (and "washy-washy," which he says when he wants to say something in English but doesn't know how)

- Seeing the smiles of all the children, receiving their big hugs, and playing and talking with them when we go visit Casa Fe

- Leaving our doors open on beautiful days and having the breeze sweep the Bouganvilla blooms into our house

- Practicing Spanish with Jaime every morning, and watching the clouds roll in over the valley

- Having Jairo explain to me how open or closed he wants his door every night after we put him to bed

- How Jairo describes every kind of food he doesn't like as "picante" (spicy), and everything he does like is his "favorite!"

- Discovering how much we enjoy "Frasier," which we watch at 6:30am after dropping Jairo off with Tio Oscar

- Taking our semi-weekly trips to Condado Shopping to visit MegaMaxi

- Seeing Jairo's sleepy smile in the morning as he tries to wake up

- Watching the babies and toddlers come down to our backyard in the mornings with their Tias, to sit in the grass, take in the warm sun, and pet Suki

- Singing the abc song to Jairo while he brushes his teeth

- Jairo thinking that a number on anything is the price of that thing (including buildings, cars, etc)

- Eating dinner in our dining room and looking out over the valley as dusk settles in and all the lights become visible. The reflection of the valley lights in our living room mirror always reminds me of our Christmas tree.

- Listening to Jairo sing "head, shoulders, knees and toes" all the time

- Playing with Suki in the backyard, seeing her waiting by our front door in the mornings, and witnessing her patience, loyalty and good nature

- Walking down our cobblestone hill every afternoon, Jairo on Eric's shoulders, the valley visible beyond the trees, talking with Jairo about his day at school

- The very inexpensive and always-available cabs, and the very friendly drivers

- Watching the birds splash in the bird bath, and the hummingbirds float around the trees outside our windows

- Discovering milk-in-a-bag, non-refrigerated eggs, and miniature napkins

- Breakfast in the kitchen, lunch on the veranda, and dinner in the dining room

- Seeing all the single-story houses with iron posts jutting up from the roofs, in hopes of a second level someday

- The winding hair-pin turns of the roads through the mountains, the rolling hills of brown and green, and the vast expanse of Quito spreading down the valley

- Fresh mountain air. Warm, sunny days. Crisp, peaceful nights.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Lost in Translation

One of the more interesting parts of our two months here in Ecuador has been speaking a new language. It has been a great learning experience for us, and our Spanish proficiency has grown tremendously. That being said, we're far from fluent, and this has led to some pretty humorous conversations and situations, since we speak only Spanish with Jairo (see Eric's previous post re: telling Jairo not to "kick himself with the money").

Also, being first-time parents, we're learning our way in this new life, and we've found ourselves saying things we've never said before.

Below are a few snippets from our daily conversations...

*****

Time Change

Eric: I can't believe how late it is.
Rebecca: What time is it?
Eric: 9:30
Rebecca: Wow, it is late. We should probably get to bed.
[pause]
R & E: Did we really just say that?


*****

Many Spanish words are very similar to one another, which makes it easy to confuse one for the other....

Snacks

Rebecca: Quieres una manzana para tu colita?*
Jairo: [blank stare]

* colacion = snack, colita = tail.
So I just asked Jairo if he wanted an apple for his tail.


Rats

In the first few days of our time with Jairo, between the combination of our minimal Spanish and his unique child's vocabulary, we had a hard time understanding him. So it was not unusual for us to misinterpret what he was saying, like this conversation that took place the first night he spent with us:

Jairo: [Something, something, something]... rato ... [something, something, something].
Rebecca: Rato? No, there are no rats here.
Jairo: No. Rato en mi cama.
Rebecca: Oh! Don't worry, I promise there are no rats in your bed.
Jairo: [blank stare]

A couple weeks later we learned that Jairo was not saying rata, which means "rat," but rather rato, which means "a while." Apparently he had been asking us to stay a while with him in his bed... not telling us there were rats in his bed.

*****

Babies

Jairo: Mami, how do babies get out of their mom's stomachs?

I was completely blindsided by the question I figured we had a few more years to prepare for. Not to mention that this isn't exactly the kind of vocabulary I've been learning in my Spanish classes. So I figured I could postpone the conversation until the next time he asked, and prepare my answer in the meantime.

Rebecca: Ummm... I don't know.
Jairo: [Proceeds to explain the different ways a baby can come into the world, in complete and anatomically correct detail].
Rebecca & Eric: [Jaws on the ground.]

*****

Dessert

Eric: Do you want your pinata candy for dessert?
Jairo: No. I shouldn't eat candy at night -- it will hurt my stomach.
Eric: Oh, ok... Good idea.
Jairo: Can I have an orange instead?

Another huge round of applause to the Tias for teaching the children such good (and often surprising) habits.


*****

Cards

Jairo has been making cards for all his friends and Tias, and for each one, we've encouraged him to choose his own words, without our direction, so the sentiments would be very authentic. Usually the cards go something like this: "Thank you for playing with me [or taking care of me]. I love you very much. I will miss you!"

But on a few of the cards we needed to step in and make some edits. Here were his first drafts:

- For one of his friends, who is at times a little aggressive: "Please don't bite me."

- For another friend, who has some muscle weaknesses: "Thank you for not drooling."

- For Tio Alfredo, the orphanage guard: "Thank you for keeping the robbers and the rats out of our house."


*****

Milk

Jairo has milk with his cereal each morning, and often milk with dinner. Each time we serve it to him, he asks us if it's milk from a cow, and each time we answer, "yes." So one time I was curious to know why he was asking, thinking perhaps they had goat's milk back at the orphanage, so I probed...

Jairo: Is this milk from a cow?
Rebecca: Yes. All the milk we drink is from cows. Where was the milk from that you drank at Casa Fe?
Jairo: A store.

Apparently Jairo thinks Eric and I have been getting up early to milk a cow each morning!

*****

Eric's humor

This week we went out to dinner one last time, to celebrate our great experience here in Ecuador. At dinner we reflected on our time here, and talked about our next steps when we return home.

Eric: What are you looking forward to most when we return home?
Rebecca: Introducing Jairo to our family, his new home, our culture and country. And to seeing our life anew through his eyes.
Rebecca: What are you looking forward to most?
Eric: McDonalds.

After almost twelve years together, Eric still makes me laugh every day. :)

What Jairo "Inherited" from Us...

Having known Jairo for almost two months now, it has become very clear what traits he inherited from us. Here are just a few:

From Rebecca...

He is very generous. We figured this out on day 2, when he came home from school with a piece of hard candy that his friend gave him. He put it in his mouth, bit it in two (ouch!), and he gave half of it to Rebecca and half of it to me...rather than eating it himself.

He looks for ways to help out those in need. Living with many special-needs children at the orphanage, Jairo has become very sensitive to the needs of other people. When we have had his friends over for dinner at our house, he always asks if he can feed his friend Wilma, who is in a wheelchair and doesn't have the use of her arms to feed herself. Also, when he saw a man on the street with no legs, he asked if we could give him money, which clearly melted the heart of his mother who would give everything she had to such people.

He is very concerned about airplane safety (see our previous post re: his first flight). While he is checking for flotation devices, Rebecca is counting rows to the nearest exit...and I'm just shaking my head & trying to find the hidden cameras filming this dynamic duo. But as Rebecca would say, "it's good to be prepared, just in case!"

He has beautiful brown eyes. The kind you notice and the kind you remember.


From Eric...

He has a good sense of humor and laughs all the time. He is very playful, and likes to joke around with his friends, tias, and parents. He keeps us laughing as well, even though we can't always understand everything he's saying.

He loves electronics. Any gadget that is new to him, he needs to get his hands on it and push as many buttons as he can...especially cameras, video cameras, and i-pods. This is also right around the time that his "partial deafness" kicks in, since he can't seem to hear us asking him to stop touching it. The good news is that this love of pushing buttons also transfers to dishwashers and and washing machines...so he can start doing our chores and think it's "fun."

He lives for salty snacks...the more salt, the better. In fact, this is a trait of many Ecuadorians--they put so much salt on everything...when cooking, they often resort to pouring salt on food straight from the bag, since apparently it doesn't come out quickly enough from your everyday salt shaker (that being said, I have seen Jairo dump salt right from the salt shaker...into his mouth). Part of me feels bad that I've had to hide my chips/etc from him and only eat them when he's not around (same with soda, for that matter)...never thought I'd have to resort to a secret stash.

He likes to play with his hair and bite his nails. Yes, a lot of kids do this and eventually outgrow it...some of us kids don't.

He likes to count things. Every night before going to bed, he'll count how many items are on his bed, which never changes--2 pillows, 3 "amigos" (his stuffed animals), and 6 sheets/blankets (it gets cold here at night, especially with no heat). We also created a calendar for him so that every day he can count how many more days it is until we fly to the U.S. Also, many times we'll look over at him, and he'll just be counting random objects in the room...we're not sure what, nor why. Of course, Rebecca has also caught me doing the same thing. I'm still not sure what language I'm going to teach him first--English or Excel.


There are so many more...but I guess you'll have to see for yourself when we come home in a few days!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Rice: The Final Chapter

We're proud to report that our little rice adventure has a happy ending...


Fourth Batch: Practice. We've been fortunate to have Tia Isabel joining us once a week to cook traditional Ecuadorian meals, and the cooking lessons have been great. So we used our time with her to learn the right way to cook rice, and with her help, we practiced a batch, which turned out to be not-so-bad.





Fifth Batch: Success!! Thanks to the detailed notes we took while Tia Isabel was giving us rice-cooking lessons, we were able to follow the recipe on our own, and voila... good rice! It wasn't perfect, but the flavor was good, the consistency was light and fluffy, and it was definitely not something we'd be embarrassed to serve our Ecuadorian friends.





Who knew that cooking rice would involve an hour of washing, rinsing, boiling, adding 4 (!) tablespoons of salt, straining, adding olive oil (2 times), re-cooking, steaming, and most surprisingly, covering with a wet plastic bag!

...I think we may stick with Minute Rice when we get home. :)

Monday, March 15, 2010

Our last weekend

This past weekend was our last here in Ecuador -- very bittersweet for us -- and we tried to make the most of every moment...

We began the weekend with dinner out at our favorite restaurant -- Gruyere, the fondue place. It's not exactly traditional Ecuadorian fare, but it's tough to pass up a pot of melted cheese.




On Saturday morning we went to Parque Carolina, so Jairo could have his first horse ride. He had a great time, and Eric did his best to figure out how to get the horse to stop eating and start walking.




Saturday afternoon was the moment Jairo had been waiting for -- his birthday party, complete with Spiderman pinata. His birthday is March 29, but we wanted to have a party for him here, so he could celebrate with his friends and Tias. So we went up to Casa Fe, and all the kids were really excited to take a swing at the pinata. Thanks to Eric's very effective yet discreet maneuvering of the pinata, Jairo was the one to break it, which he was very proud of. It was great seeing how much the kids enjoyed the candy and trinkets that spilled out, and we were proud to see Jairo sharing his hoard of treasure with the kids with special needs who were unable to scramble for the spoils themselves.












After the pinata we had cake and soda -- a huge treat for the kids -- then Jairo's cohort of friends came down to our house for pizza and a movie. It was bittersweet to spend the evening with them, knowing that this was the last time they would all be together. The five of them have grown up together here, so they are like siblings, and we know it will be really tough for all of them when Jairo leaves. We are praying that Jessica, Fabian, Carlita and Wilma will all find families of their own very soon.

On Sunday morning Eric was a bit worn out from a late night of "watching" Georgetown lose in the Big East Finals the night before (i.e., hitting refresh on our computer every 30 seconds to get a score update), so he stayed home to rest while Jairo and I went to visit a local family. One of my ESL students back in Virginia, Martha, is from Quito, and her extended family still lives here. So she introduced us, and they invited us to spend some time with them. It was really great to see the way they live -- it's exactly as we would have imagined a family would live in rural Ecuador. They have a huge, multi-generational family all living right near one another, many under the same roof. The women were all busy in the kitchen preparing the food, the many children were running and playing in the crops outside, and the men were talking about the local futbol (soccer) teams. Jairo fit right in, and enjoyed playing in the choclo (corn) and climbing the guava trees to pick the fruit. And he was in heaven playing with the many, many dogs on their property. It was a rare opportunity to get away from the well-worn tourist routes, and to experience how real life is lived in Ecuador. We are very grateful to Martha's family for their warm and gracious hospitality.








We returned home around noon on Sunday, just in time to have some guests over for lunch. Our friends Claire, Andrew and their daughter Sienna joined us for a casual lunch, and we enjoyed seeing them one more time before we head home. We rounded out Sunday afternoon with our normal routine of weekend activities -- playing with Suki, watching a movie, and doing homework.





Sunday night was very special for us, as we went up to Casa Fe to give gifts to Jairo's Tias. We had brought some things for them from the US, and Jairo had made them cards. We also wrote letters to them, doing our best to thank them for raising our son so well over the past four years (though words could never begin to convey the depth of our feelings). We went to Casa Fe after all the children were in bed, so it was nice to have some time alone with the Tias, and they used the quiet time to tell Jairo what they were feeling in their hearts. Though we could only understand about 75% of what they were saying, it was more than enough for us to know just how much they love Jairo. They also said many, many kind things to Eric and me, which meant so much to us. Needless to say, it was a very tender experience, there were a lot of tears, and it was something we will all always remember.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

ContourWear

Several years ago, a couple good friends of ours started a company, ContourWear, which offers travel clothing for women. The founders, Julie & Karen, both travelers, realized that there were very few clothes on the market that were both stylish and high-performance, so they decided to design and manufacture a line for themselves. We have enjoyed watching them grow and succeed, and on a personal note, I have loved wearing their clothes on our trips around the world.

As someone who tries to pack light, I like to bring clothes that can serve many purposes, and the Contour clothes do just that -- they are comfortable & stylish, they don't wrinkle, fade or stretch, and they dry super-quickly. And the line is designed to mix-and-match, so it's easy to just pack a few pieces for a long trip.

I am extremely grateful to Julie, the CEO, who very generously outfitted me for this trip. She sent me a care package of about 15 items -- shirts, pants, skirts, dresses -- all of which are fantastic. I highly recommend their clothes -- not just for adventure travel, but for daily wear as well. You can find their line in the national outdoor stores (REI, etc), or check them out here: www.ContourWear.com.

With apologies from the model, who does not do justice to the clothes, here are a few samples:





Saturday, March 13, 2010

Morning in the valley

Quito has two seasons -- summer and winter. The temperature remains fairly constant across the seasons, so the only thing that distinguishes one from the other is the amount of rain. We're currently in winter, so most mornings have some clouds, and the afternoons are clear.

One of the things I have enjoyed over these past two months is waking up early and watching the clouds roll in over the valley. Our house sits on the side of a mountain, so we have a 180 degree view of the valley, with mountains and a snow-capped volcano in the distance. There is a small ridge that divides the valley, and the clouds usually form on the other side of the ridge.

This morning, as I was sitting quietly and preparing for my Spanish lesson, I had the opportunity to witness the clouds in motion. They first formed in the valley beyond the ridge, and when they filled the basin, they began to crest and curl over the top of the ridge. Then they slowly rolled down the mountain, blanketing the houses below. It was like a slow-motion ocean wave, magnificent to watch...







Wednesday, March 10, 2010

A Special Day



A year ago, almost to the day, we turned in our application to adopt a child... and today Jairo officially became a part of our family. To some extent, today was just a formality. For us, we became family when we first hugged and kissed him on January 25th... or when we first saw his picture... or when the idea of adopting a child from South America first entered our hearts 5 years ago. Formality or no, today is a day we will remember for the rest of our lives. We are so blessed that Jairo is our son.

While this day holds a lot of significance for us because we finalized the adoption process, what Jairo will remember most (at least for now) is that today was the first day he rode on an airplane! We had to fly to Guayaquil to finalize the paperwork, so Jairo was beside himself with excitement about this great adventure. He jumped out of his seat in the taxi when he saw all the airplanes lined up at the airport, and he couldn't stop staring at the planes from the window in the waiting area, especially when the planes were taking off.



Although he was excited to go on an airplane, he did have some anxieties that he shared with us prior to the trip -- first, that it would be "very windy" on the plane since it would be going so fast and be so high; and second, that he "might fall out" of the plane if his seat belt wasn't tight enough... oh, to see life through the eyes of a child! It came as no surprise to us that Jairo went right for the safety instructions on the plane immediately after we boarded... and within minutes, he was looking under his seat to ensure that the promised flotation device was securely in place (clearly this is something he inherited from his mother, who counts the rows to the nearest exit before every takeoff).



He was so fascinated with the take-off, and how small everything got as the plane rose higher.



But it only took him about 10 minutes to realize that there was nothing to worry about, and he could just sit back and enjoy the ride...sans wind.



One more little tidbit about the airplane experience -- on our way back from Guayaquil, one of the flight attendants invited Jairo to meet the pilots in the cockpit. For those of you keeping score, this means that Rebecca and I have taken about 500 flights with zero invites to the cockpit... and Jairo has been invited to the cockpit on 50% of all his flights.



Anyway, there wasn't a whole lot to our day in Guayaquil, except for more waiting, more questions to answer, and more papers to sign... something we've gotten very used to over the last year. We had a few hours of free time in the afternoon while we waited for our last document to be finalized, so we grabbed some lunch, played some video games, and paid a visit to the local iguana park.



And then the moment finally came. We headed back to the U.S. Consulate to pick up our last document. (Side note: We told Jairo that we had to go to the Embassy, which is called la embajada in Spanish, so today we got a good chuckle when he was telling everyone he was going to la empanada.) Because of the security at the Consulate, only one of us could go in, so I waited outside with Jairo while Rebecca went inside. Jairo and I again improvised some new games with the one thing that we had with us -- an eraser that he "bought" with the tickets he earned at the arcade. Everything from "guess which hand," "how far do you think the eraser will bounce off the wall," and "do you think I can hit the security guard's pistol with this eraser."

But there were two moments that will stick in my head forever. The first, and much more superficial, is when during a break in our games I looked over at Jairo, and he was going through the motion of a golf swing... I asked him what he was doing, and he told me that he was "practicing golf for when he will play with Papi and Abuelo" (this also proved to me that I "practice" my swing way too often).

The second moment was when I saw Rebecca walk out of the Consulate's office with our final paperwork. Similar to our wedding when I watched her walk down the aisle, time seemed to suddenly change to slow motion as she walked toward me... her beautiful smile, the unmistakable sparkle in her eyes, and the clear sense that our lives will somehow, once again, be so much better than we could have ever imagined.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Weekend at the Spa

Last weekend we visited Papallacta, a small town 1.5 hours outside of Quito. We stayed at a wonderful, relaxing spa called Hotel Termas Papallacta. Jairo was more excited to take this bus ride than the one the weekend before (when "shopping" met him at the end of the trip), since the bus' destination this time included many pools...he absolutely loves the water and loves to swim.

The hotel had a very peaceful, idyllic setting--numerous small thermal pools and cabins surrounded by lush mountains. It was so relaxing to just sit in the very (very...very) warm water and take in the natural surroundings. We also took advantage of the spa's $35 massages. This was definitely the type of place that would cost 5x more in the U.S., so it was nice to enjoy these luxuries and amenities in a price range that we could actually afford.







The other highlight of the weekend was that we visited the equator--there is a monument commemorating Mitad del Mundo about 20 minutes from our house.



Oddly, when we put one foot in the northern hemisphere where it is currently winter, and one foot in the southern hemisphere where it is currently summer, the temperature felt exactly the same. Go figure. Also, as you can see from the picture, the equator is actually orange, even though it shows up as black on most globes.

{and, yes, I have found that ever since I turned 40, my jokes have gotten worse...but I promise to work on new material}.

Only one more weekend left in Ecuador...so bittersweet. We really miss everyone at home, but we have also really embraced our simple life and daily routine down here in Ecuador.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Lemons

We recently discovered that Jairo likes to eat lemons. It's hard for us to imagine taking even a small bite of a lemon, let alone eating the whole thing -- but Jairo seems to really enjoy it, regardless of how sour it may be.

When we were out to dinner for Eric's birthday, the waiter served water with lemons, and Jairo asked if he could have an extra lemon. So the waiter brought him one, and this is what ensued. Needless to say, we were in hysterics watching his little adventure.







Sunday, February 28, 2010

My Birthday

I had such a fun, memorable weekend celebrating my 40th birthday. Thanks again for all of your birthday wishes! I was touched with how many people remembered.

We kicked off the weekend on Friday evening by inviting Jairo's usual group of friends over for games, dinner and a movie. We played in the backyard for a while, including a heavy dose of my new exercise routine ("the alligator"), which we will soon be marketing in the U.S. as the latest fitness gimic. It involves pulling children on a plastic see-saw alligator with a long rope that I removed from an old swing (when there aren't a lot of toys around, you need to improvise). Apparently pulling them at a slow pace didn't quite do the trick, as their shouts of "rapido, rapido" clearly indicated. Since I wanted to live to be 40, this game of running while pulling about 90 pounds behind me only lasted about 20 minutes...at which point the kids tried to just do it themselves, without much success:



We headed inside to wait for the pizza, and Jairo entertained the ninos with a couple songs that he has learned during his piano lessons ("Baa Baa Black Sheep" and "Mary Had a Little Lamb"). We think it's great that he always pulls out the piano books to pretend that he's actually playing the songs in the books:



Rebecca then stepped it up a notch by breaking out the i-pod for a little dance party, which consisted of "I Like to Move it Move it" played a good 10 times in a row. We then settled down for dinner, after which we watched "Alvin and the Chipmunks" with a delicious dessert of conguil (popcorn...Papi's favorite). Just another fun night with Jairo and his friends...he (and we) are really going to miss them!



On Saturday, we headed out to Otavallo, a town that is about 2 hours north of Quito. We rode one of the local buses there...and again felt very fortunate that one of the 2 main bus terminals in Quito is located only a few blocks from the orphanage...makes these day trips so much easier (not to mention that the 2-hour bus ride only costs $2)! We're so dependent on our cars at home, but we have gotten so used to taking cabs ($2-4 to almost anywhere in Quito) and buses here that we've forgotten what it's like to have a car.

Otavallo hosts a large outdoor market every Saturday, filled with arts & crafts, food, and clothes. We felt somewhat guilty that we made Jairo ride a bus for 2 hours, only to find out that he then had to go shopping for a few hours...but he was a good sport and was very patient throughout the afternoon. We bought a few things, including one of the market's hot items--finger puppets (I bought a Bart Simpson; Jairo, a Spiderman). Rebecca added to her collection of clothes bought around the world, and I added to my pen- and random collection of chatchkis bought around the world.



We played with Suki when we got home, and then settled in for a couple movies since we were pretty beat after a long day of riding and walking.



Rebecca and I celebrated the final hours of my 30s with a box of wine and American Idol. Unfortunately we were too tired to make it until midnight...guess that's what happens when "sleeping in" now means 7:00am.

Which brings us to Sunday, my 40th birthday. In thinking back to previous milestone birthdays, I remembered that I had a bowling and pizza party for my 10th birthday (how do I remember? I had such a birthday 4-5 years in a row); my 20th birthday included Bert & Ernie cakes; and for my 30th, Rebecca took me to Disneyworld. So with the "little kid in me" still alive and well, we decided on bowling & pizza again for my 40th.

After eating toast and yogurt (bleh!) almost every morning for breakfast while in Quito, Rebecca made us a delicious breakfast of bacon, sausage and eggs. Afterward, we broke out an old-school game that I found in one of the closets of the house we're renting--electric football!! I loved that game as a kid, and had 3 different versions of it during my childhood. Jairo enjoyed setting everything up and playing with me.



We then headed out to get pizza for lunch at Archie's, the pizza place that we went to a few weeks ago. Unfortunately our party of 3 wasn't large enough to warrant reserving the private room in the back where all the other kids celebrated their birthdays...oh well.

Then on to bowling. I don't know if it was my new age, my new decade, the fact that they didn't have one ball that i could fit my thumb into (remember, I'm considered a giant down here), or my subconscious brain wanting this to happen, but Rebecca won the first game.....and Jairo came in second. Which left third place for yours truly. Needless to say we weren't going to leave until I had a chance to redeem myself...which I didn't. Congrats to Rebecca for bowling her highest score ever to win the second game as well, but at least this time I came in 2nd (I think Jairo let me beat him this time, as evidenced by the fact that he experimented with a few bowling styles, including his patented "overhand toss").



We had a blast, and I was proud of myself for actually "growing up" in at least in some areas of my life--when my high school girlfriend beat me in bowling, I didn't talk to her for days...this time I only pouted for a few minutes. I credit Derek Jeter for teaching me how to lose gracefully (during those rare instances when he actually lost).

We went back home to play in the backyard, where the three of us played catch with our tennis ball. Jairo does extremely well with the "throwing" part of the game (again, well-suited to play either center field or shortstop for the Yankees)...and is getting better at the "catching" side of the game, which will come with more practice, a mitt, and bigger hands. We forgot to take pictures, but I am including one that we forgot to include in a previous post--this is Jairo and I playing "baseball" with a plastic blue ball and our fists as the "bat" (since we haven't been able to find a wiffle bat or ball down here...again, we improvise where we can!):



After napping, it was time for presents and cake! Rebecca took Jairo out a few days ago to find presents for me--he selected a little stuffed tiger (that roars when you squeeze him); a pen with a TV on top of it (that has a slide show of the cast of "High School Musical"); and some index cards (to be added to my stack of flash cards I've created to help me learn Spanish).





I then opened cards and gifts from Rebecca and some family members. I always feel so lucky and blessed to have so many wonderful, thoughtful people in my life...and no one more so than Rebecca--the most beautiful, selfless, generous person I have ever met...who I have learned so much from during the (almost) 12 years we've been together.

Cake followed the gifts, which included Jairo's precious solo of "Cumpleanos Feliz." It is an Ecuadorian tradition for the birthday honoree to stick their face in the cake, which Jairo happily did on my behalf.





We finished the evening with a great dinner at a fancy steak restaurant...a great way to cap off such a fun, memorable day & weekend! Jairo had us laughing all night at dinner...and he had us in tearful hysterics on the 10-minute cab ride home, during which he was pretty much having a one-way "conversation" with the cab driver...updating him on everything we've done over the last few weeks, as well as what is to come when he moves to the United States (the cabbie became very well-versed on what school he goes to, who Duffer is, and what months our pool in Fairlington is open).

Jairo is the greatest gift of all, and we anxiously await our judge to sign off on our final adoption decree. Rumor has it that this may have happened over the last few days, but we won't know for sure until we have the final paperwork. So keep us in your prayers...and look out for an upcoming post in (hopefully) the very near future!